Resolving

"So let us summon a new spirit of patriotism, of responsibility, where each of us resolves to pitch in and work harder and look after not only ourselves but each other."
~President-Elect Barack Obama, in his acceptance speech, November 4th, 2008

Have you made any New Year's resolutions? I googled to find out the most common ones:
lose weight
get organized
get out of debt
learn something new
spend more time with family

"Getting out of debt" may top "losing weight" this year in the uncertain economic climate. I'm planning to work on both--consumerism is bad for our waistline and our pocketbooks!

"Help others" is actually on a lot of people's lists, but following through with such altruistic leanings can be tough. Last year I resolved to give someone a gift every week. I realized that most Christmases I can remember what I gave other people better than I can remember what I was given. It's not that I don't appreciate the gifts, it's just that I tend to spend a lot more time thinking about what people might like, and I enjoy watching them open a well-picked gift even more than I like getting one (maybe I just need to write more thank you notes, but then that's a post for another day!). The plan was to give inexpensive gifts, nothing major--just a little something to remind the recipients (sometimes anonymously) that someone cared about them. I gave a co-worker who liked fresh brewed tea a special tea cup. I gave a mentally challenged friend a craft kit she loved. I took a friend to lunch and treated. Nothing that cost me much in dollars or effort really, and the appreciation and thanks I received was rewarding. It was good to be reminded that I'm blessed and that I should share my blessings.

I don't remember exactly how long it lasted, but I know it wasn't more than a couple of months. Like most people that make resolutions, I slowly began to skip a week, then gradually just quit. Being a giver wasn't hard, remembering to be a giver was hard. You have to keep thinking about other people and what they might like and looking for opportunities to give. I don't think I consciously decided to stop-- I just let it go.

My husband is always reminding me that you need to have clearly defined goals if you want to accomplish something. I agree with that, but you also have to have stamina and determination to make a change and to follow through. They say it's good to have a friend to hold you accountable to your goals. Maybe I needed a 'giving buddy'--someone to spur me on to do good deeds and remind me of my promise.

It may be a tough year for you and me. "You never know what's coming for you..", says the mother in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. What ever the good Lord sends our way, let's all resolve to do what our soon-to-be new president suggests and " look after not only ourselves but each other". And if anyone needs a "giving buddy", let me know!

"This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers. If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him? Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth." (1 John 3:16-18)

A Reminder: What Christmas is All About

Be Faithful

"The goal of faithfulness is not that we will do work for God, but that He will be free to do His work through us. God calls us to His service and places tremendous responsibilities on us. He expects no complaining on our part and offers no explanation on His part. God wants to use us as He used His own Son." ~Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest (emphasis mine)

Just a reminder-- one I needed (sigh!)--to get my focus back on who I serve, rather than what I am doing to serve. Click the link to go to read the rest of a great entry in the daily devotional for today.

The Reason Behind All This Time and Sand

Things I've done for work in the last couple of weeks:

• Fluffed and straightened limbs on a 14' Christmas tree
• Assembled and fluffed a 5 foot, 6 foot, and 7 foot tree
• Climbed on scaffolding and ladders to hang lights on 14' and 7' trees
• Got a splinter while climbing on scaffolding
• Shopped at 6 different Walmart stores and at least 4 Target stores
• Purchased black ski masks, industrial strength velcro, red umbrellas, gloves, 24 LED flashlights, 2 types of magnets, superballs, dog balls, tennis balls, mesh ball bags, 20+ yoga/pilates balls, 64 large (8" diameter) Christmas ornaments, 64 kickballs, Christmas tree lights, ribbon
• Deflated 15 inflated yoga balls by sitting on them and smashing the air out
• Super glued magnets onto large Christmas tree ornaments (didn't work--polarization is an unforgiving natural force)
• Cut and bent heavy gauge wire into Christmas ornament hooks. 64 of them.
• Painted a big wooden box bright Christmas green.

I need a manicure. My hands look like I've been playing with a grouchy cat. It's been a busy week, with tasks at work becoming more physical and more "under the gun" as the week wore on. I have to admit that it was hard to keep a good attitude at times. I wanted to be doing more creating and less intern-type tasks. I understand it's just the nature of being new kid on the block at the busiest time in the church calender year, but I had to keep fighting down "pitiful me" feelings of "isn't there someone else to do this?" and "this is not what I expected!"

The holidays prime you for reminiscing about "auld lang syne" even before the New Year arrives, and when you've had a year of change and new beginnings it's hard not to look back over your shoulder sometimes and say, "why can't it just be like it used to be?" It's hard not to miss the old times past where the kids happily spent time with us and even helped decorate the tree, I was enjoying most of my working relationships and felt a great level of competence and creative freedom in my work, and there was wonderful rapport with all our friends and family!

Ok, who am I kidding? While all of those were true maybe for brief moments, they weren't the norm. There are ebbs and flows in jobs and relationships. And some of those things are true even now--creative sharing, developing work relationships and friendships--and while the kids didn't help with the tree, they do seem to enjoy hanging out with us at least some of the time. So why the longing for the past?

There's a great song by one of my favorite artists, Sara Groves called "Painting Pictures of Egypt". The metaphor is from the story of the Israelites wandering in the desert in their long journey to the land God had promised them. They became so discouraged at one point they longed to go back to the place where they had been slaves. (Now, please! I'm not implying that where I came from was comparable to Egyptian slavery--just that it wasn't where God wanted me to stay!) Anyway, here's the chorus:

"I’ve been painting pictures of Egypt
Leaving out what it lacked
The future seems so hard
And I want to go back
But the places that used to fit me
Cannot hold the things I"ve learned
And those roads closed off to me
While my back was turned "

Change is hard. I don't want to go back. But I do miss it.

Advent: Something Momentous

Advent: "The coming or arrival, especially of something extremely important or arrival that has been awaited (especially of something momentous)"

It seems like every year we are well into December before I break down (usually involving tears and frustration lashing out at loved ones) and go, hmmm...maybe I should consider doing something to help me focus spiritually on what the season means, rather than just my to-do list for the season. This year is no exception, but I did find a great online daily Advent devotional to help me this year. Called "Following the Star", it is a great way to get your focus back (thanks, Jenni!). It also seems to be free of "wise-men-still-seek-him, reason-for-the-season" cliches that tend to run amok in these things.

This week is our church's big Christmas "premiere"-a sort of dressiest dress rehearsal before the actual performances closer to Christmas day. Needless to say I'll be busy, but it's exciting to be part of something that thousands of people watch that has the potential to change how they look at Christmas and more importantly, how they view God. I've so far only seen bits and pieces of the whole program as I have been doing background support work to get things ready. I'm excited to see it as a whole! It feels momentous to me!

Strength for the Long Haul (Parenting)

Check out this great article over at internetmonk on parenting. I may be past the point of "raising" my children, but I still found some encouragement and good thoughts here. Even if we're grown ups, it doesn't mean we don't need to encourage others who are trying to raise good grow ups.

So, I'll also offer this word of encouragement from Colossians 1 (from The Message):

"We pray that you'll have the strength to stick it out over the long haul—not the grim strength of gritting your teeth but the glory-strength God gives. It is strength that endures the unendurable and spills over into joy, thanking the Father who makes us strong enough to take part in everything bright and beautiful that he has for us."

Hang in there.

A Prayer for Thanksgiving

O God, when I have food,
help me to remember the hungry;

When I have work,
help me to remember the jobless;
When I have a home,
help me to remember those who have no home at all;
When I am without pain,
help me to remember those who suffer,
And remembering,
help me to destroy my complacency;
bestir my compassion,
and be concerned enough to help;
By word and deed,
those who cry out for what we take for granted.
Amen.

- Samuel F. Pugh (ordained minister of the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) for over 70 years)

Trying, Failing, but still Traveling...

"Attack me, I do this myself, but attack me rather than the path I follow and which I point out to anyone who asks me where I think it lies. If I know the way home and am walking along it drunkenly, is it any less the right way because I am staggering from side to side!"
~Leo Tolstoy, 19th century Russian novelist, quoted in UnChristian: What a New Generation Really Thinks About Christianity...And Why It Matters, by David Kinnaman and Gabe Lyons. You should read this book.

A Life of Faith

"Living a life of faith means never knowing where you are being led,” writes Oswald Chambers. “But it does mean loving and knowing the One who is leading. It is literally a life of faith, not of understanding and reason – a life of knowing him who calls us to go.”

I am going. I am starting a new job at a new church. I am (well technically, "we are") leaving our church and joining this new church. It hasn't been an easy decision. While most friends understand it and know and love us enough to have an idea of our motivations, people still ask, "Why?" It's not an easy story to tell, because there are lots of little stories that led us down this path.

The short version is "Our pastor and friend left. When we knew he was leaving, we stopped to evaluate my job and our service and God began to call us elsewhere."

Maybe a metaphor would help: "When we tried to unpack the overstuffed emotional baggage that comes from being deeply involved in a church that is going through years of 'transition' and struggles, we found that we just needed a whole new suitcase. The old stuff in there doesn't even fit us anymore."

My husband in exasperation has said, "Sometimes you just need to change churches after 16 years! There doesn't have to be a big overly-spiritualized reason!"

The faith side of it is I cracked the door open in a moment of worry and grief about the coming changes and tossed out a resume. And I feel like God flung the door wide open and said "come on, we're going somewhere and it's going to be big and scary and exciting and a lot of people won't understand, but I'm in it and that's what matters."

And after much wrestling, procrastinating, whining, and praying, there was a peace that settled in. I hadn't really even said "yes, I'll go with you on this" in my head, but my heart was already there. There was peace.

At one point in the wrestling process, I sat on the front porch step while my husband worked in the yard on a gorgeous late August day and I felt the Holy Spirit. Now if you know me at all, you know I am generally more a thinker than an emotional/feeler kind of person in this area, but I'm telling you I felt Him. A breeze and the sun and then the quiet whisper saying to my soul "It's going to be alright. Trust me." I hadn't decided yet, but God was with me in the tension, reminding me that whether or not I understood or knew where I was going, He was with me. He would be the one calling me.

Most of the people at our church are staying. The most amazing and encouraging thing is that I've literally heard the exact same words coming from many people: "God isn't telling me to go, so we are staying." Listening to what God is saying, whether it is "stay" or "go"--following Him when you don't know where you're being led--that is what it means to live a life of faith. May we be gracious and encourage each other to keep our eyes on the "One who is leading".

There is a Time for Everything

"It’s time for letting go | All of our if only’s
‘Cause we don’t have a time machine
And even if we did | Would we really want to use it?
Would we really want to go change everything?"

When our daughter was little, kindergarten age, we decided to rearrange her room one day while she was gone somewhere. Though we were pleased with the outcome, when she came home she took one look and tearfully wailed, "but that's not the way it's supposed to go!" She, like most of us, didn't like changes being made to her stable pink bedroom world. I guess the past month or so, I've been saying something pretty similar to my heavenly Father. Something that sounds a lot like "but that's not the way it's supposed to go". Change is tough at any age.

"‘Cause we are who and where and what we are for now,
And this is the only moment we can do anything about"

Last Sunday our senior pastor, who I am an assistant to, resigned from our church. There are many things that led up to that decision, but for this space and audience, let me just say he and his family have been called to another church, in another state. And although it's hard to say goodbye, I know it's God's plan for them.

"And if it brings you tears, Then taste them as they fall
And let them soften your heart"

It's been a time for weeping. I'm losing not only my pastor and co-worker, but a good friend and brother in the Lord. I enjoy his wife and young girls and he and my husband have developed a friendship as well. We've worked together for close to seven years--first with me as a volunteer, while he was associate and interim, then for the past 3 and a half years as his assistant and the church secretary during his time of being the senior pastor. They have often been difficult years. We've been a church that has chosen to define itself as stuck "in transition". I'll spare you the wearing and surprisingly harsh details, but suffice it to say--brace yourself if you were not aware of this-- that often church people do not live out what they believe.

"There’s only one who knows, What’s really out there waiting
In all the moments yet to be.
And all we need to know, Is He’s out there waiting
To Him the future’s history"

After hearing the news, as God would have it I was headed to my parents for a week to help my mother recover from knee replacement surgery. His timing was perfect, as I had a week not only to focus on another person's pain, but also to think and pray through mine. One morning as I sat on their back porch sipping my cup of coffee and looking into the woods behind their house, I saw a deer come across the road and walk through the trees. Another morning, I saw a mother and her two fawns frolicking (there is really no other word to describe it!) across the road. I watched hummingbirds swarm the feeder in front of their window. I sat and talked to my best friend from school for a whole morning, hearing the story of God's work in her life. I hiked in the rocky trails of Rim Rock, reminiscing with my dad about the times we'd climbed to the tops of each outcropping. I kissed my niece and nephew goodbye as they waited together for the bus on their first day back to school, all new clothes and shoes and backpacks and excitement.

So breathe it in and breathe it out, Listen to your heartbeat
There’s a wonder in the here and now,
It’s right there in front of you
And I don’t want you to miss
The miracle of the moment

Through those things I heard the God "who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine" gently and quietly saying "Trust me." "I love you." "I remember you. Remember all I've done for you?"

"And if it brings you laughter, Then throw your head back
And let it go, let it go. You gotta let it go
Listen to your heartbeat"

It's still hard. As a visiting missionary said last week, sometimes when God's doing his best work, from our finite vantage point it just seems like it stinks to us. There are more changes, uncertainty, and difficult times ahead. But though I weep, I don't fear. The One who calls us is faithful. One of my friends said after hearing the news, "this is exciting, because it means God is working!" At the time, I found that a bit annoying, but he was right. "Trust me!" God continues to say, and I am doing my best to do just that.

"And He has given us a treasure called right now
And this is the only moment we can do anything about "

(from the song "Miracle of the Moment" by Steven Curtis Chapman)

Sacramental Summer

Apologizing once again...but summer days are fleeting and I want to spend the time enjoying them. So blogging is being back-burnered a bit and I should think reading blogs should be back-burnered a bit for all of you! Go out and stand in the sunshine or the rain or the lake. Take a deep breath. Breathe out a praise to the Lord who knows we need seasons to come and go and kick us out of the ruts of routine that we tend to stick the plow of our lives in.

"Nature to a saint is sacramental. If we are children of God, we have a tremendous treasure in Nature. In every wind that blows, in every night and day of the year, in every sign of the sky, in every blossoming and in every withering of the earth, there is a real coming of God to us if we will simply use our starved imagination to realize it."
~Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest

Go out and feed your imagination.

When Death Comes

When death comes
like the hungry bear in autumn;
when death comes and takes all the bright coins from his purse

to buy me, and snaps the purse shut;
when death comes
like the measles-pox;

when death comes
like an iceberg between the shoulder blades,

I want to step through the door full of curiosity, wondering:
what is it going to be like, that cottage of darkness?

And therefore I look upon everything
as a brotherhood and a sisterhood,
and I look upon time as no more than an idea,
and I consider eternity as another possibility,

and I think of each life as a flower, as common
as a field daisy, and as singular,

and each name a comfortable music in the mouth
tending as all music does, toward silence,

and each body a lion of courage, and something
precious to the earth.

When it's over, I want to say: all my life
I was a bride married to amazement.
I was the bridegroom, taking the world into my arms.

When it is over, I don't want to wonder
if I have made of my life something particular, and real.
I don't want to find myself sighing and frightened,
or full of argument.

I don't want to end up simply having visited this world.

By Mary Oliver

"I'm a Ranker"

Recently, while discussing a particularly bad movie, my daughter relayed a comment from a friend. They had been discussing movies, and the friend promptly rattled off her top 3 (Shawshank Redemption, Jaws,....). Her friend also offered up this comment: "I'm a ranker"--someone who likes to rank things in categories. I thought this was a very odd and interesting turn of phrase. Technically, "ranker" is a word meaning "a commissioned officer who has been promoted from enlisted status". But, to use the word as she did, haven't we become a nation of "rankers"?

Pop media is all about rating and judging and categorizing things. Google "top ten" on the internet and you'll get 68,900,000 entries (Top Ten most facinating urinals was one of the first listed and amazingly, very cool!) . Try to find a newspaper or magazine at the start of the year without a "year's best" listing. The three big shows on TV tonight are American Idol (which I am watching while I type this, I must admit), Dancing With the Stars, and The Biggest Loser (which I guess at least has a quantitative element, and is not just opinion) which in a way train us to rate various qualities in others. Now, I'm not saying that we don't already have this built in to our nature anyway. I was amazed how my children at an very young age could tell you who in their class was the "prettiest" or the "smartest". If I had asked, I'm sure they also could have told me who was the "ugliest" or the "meanest."

I've heard it said that the true consequence of eating the fruit from the tree "of the knowledge of good and evil" is that we are unable to just love someone unconditionally as God does. Instead, we can't help but judge others. If you don't believe me, try to sit in a mall, watch people go by and not attach a descriptive label to them in your head. (credits to my pastor for this concept). What it boils down to is that it's easier to put people in categories than it is to get to know them. Easier to rank them than to understand where they're coming from. Easier to judge them than to help them.

Even the disciples were "rankers"! A select group had been on a mountain where they had just seen Jesus as He really was/is--transfigured and displaying His glory. It was a moment where God visibly and unequivocally showed and told them who was "numero uno". Almost the very next thing they do? Argue over "who among them was greatest"! (Text message "2" for Peter..."3" for James....) Don't you just wonder how deeply Jesus must have sighed before his reply? "He sat down and summoned the Twelve." Notice, he gathers ALL of them together. I'm thinking the ones that had been arguing about it must have felt like they were suddenly "in the bottom 3". He then said to them, "So you want first place? Then take the last place. Be the servant of all." (Mark 9:35, The Message)

In God's kingdom, ranking is turned on it's head. God doesn't say, "good job, you made the top 10 (or 10 million)", he says, "the first will be last, and the last will be first", in what Eugene Petersen calls "the Great Reversal". Later, James puts this concept into very practical terms:

"For example, suppose someone comes into your meeting dressed in fancy clothes and expensive jewelry, and another comes in who is poor and dressed in dirty clothes. If you give special attention and a good seat to the rich person, but you say to the poor one, “You can stand over there, or else sit on the floor”—well, doesn’t this discrimination show that your judgments are guided by evil motives? Listen to me, dear brothers and sisters. Hasn’t God chosen the poor in this world to be rich in faith? Aren’t they the ones who will inherit the Kingdom he promised to those who love him?" (James 2:2-5)

If the whole point is to not seek to be 'first', then don't you think there's something wrong when all we do is try to place people in first through last, most to least important categories? At the very least, aren't we training our minds to think in patterns opposite of the way we should react? Instead of of thinking, "pretty", "too tall", "overweight", "rich", or "poor", shouldn't we be thinking "lost", "hurting", or "searching for meaning"? In a way, that's still categorizing, but these are labels we can only use if we know someone, and have some degree of empathy and compassion for them. One of the results of maturity should be the ability to accept others as having worth and merit just for being God created (and loved) individuals. My desire should be to grow into "the servant of all"--regardless of how unlovely, how undeserving they may be be in my own eyes.

So the competition is on! What will you do this week to try to end up in last place?

Another Day, Another Pie

As I was driving home from work on Friday, I heard an slightly annoying TV/radio personality saying something to the effect: "In honor of the leap day, more people should take advantage of February 29, as it provides an extra 24 hours in the calendar to catch up on miscellaneous errands." An extra 24 hours! Having been sick with a stomach bug for about 36 hours during the week (thus the lack of blog entries!), the thought struck me as a good one.

Except...the day had already passed. I had hurried off to work, completed my regular end of the week tasks, had several nice exchanges with visitors to the office (Friday seems to be 'drop by and say hello day' at our church), and then left a little early to make it to a physical therapy appointment for my current malady--tennis elbow (another reason for the lack of recent entries). It didn't feel "extra". It didn't feel special. As a matter of fact, due to a lingering "punky" feeling physically, and feeling emotionally let down by a couple of people, it felt pretty lousy. Even the good things seemed to backfire. Physical therapy felt great, but seemed to trigger every sore nerve in my arm making sleep nearly impossible. So as a far as "Leap day" goes, I am in agreement with my hubby who says "why don't they add the day to June?"

Now fortunately, there were bright spots to the evening. My hubby, sensing my mood (maybe it was the long litany of complaints on the phone?) brought me flowers. And a pie! Ok, the pie was more for him, but since I have a sweet tooth I inherited from my grandfather, it didn't hurt. We went out to a nice dinner at Pizza Coco. We also watched our DVR'ed episode of Lost, where I actually caught a reference by the character "C. (Charlotte) S. Lewis" that time moves slower on the island than in the real world--a blatant reference to Narnia, I think (for way deeper connections check here).

Yet despite the nice evening, as I weigh my feelings about the whole day, if given the choice I'd probably be willing to give the day back. In reality, it was an extra day. It was really added to the calendar and consisted of an extra 24 hours. But I had treated it like any other day. I didn't see it as a gift. I didn't even use the time to"catch up on miscellaneous errands" as pitifully insignificant as that would have been.

At around 1 am, the start of a new day technically, I tried to chase sleep by catching up on the daily scripture readings from last week's sermon. They included this verse:

"Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is. " (Eph. 5:15-17)

The Message puts the first part of verse 17, "Don't live carelessly, unthinkingly."

What if I had remembered that morning that it was an "extra" day? If I had treated it not like a "Hallmark holiday", but like a special day that really mattered? Shouldn't I live every day that way? Each 24 hours here on earth may only be a moment in eternity, but it's up to me "make the most of every opportunity" .... to show love, to give encouragement, and to give thanks for each day. I don't need to wait another 4 years to start doing that.

Island Living

"All of my books are about achieving the isolation that our culture tells us should make us happy. Someone has gotten onto an island or into a high-rise condo and is completely cut off from all 'the jerks' in the world. That's supposed to make them happy, but they are more miserable than they ever were."
Chuck Palahniuk, author. From an interview in Relevant Magazine, Sept. 2004

I think this is a great illustration of much of the church in America in recent history. We somehow thought that isolating ourselves from culture and people that aren't like us and that we frankly, just consider 'the jerks' in the world, would make us not only happier, but holier.

Now, it's easy for me to lob that insult at other Christians, especially 'older' ones (because, of course, we younger ones are all missional and authentic and all that, you know). It's harder to admit that too often the isolating myself in my little happy Jesus box is my own "modus operandi". When given the choice of hanging out with friends that laugh at my jokes, other believers that understand my "Christianese", and acquaintances that willingly make polite conversation OR talking to people who don't agree with, get, or even like my humor, lingo, and beliefs, the obvious choice is the one I mostly choose.

The thing is--always interacting with like-minded souls gets pretty boring. It's like discussing a movie that you've all seen a few times. You can only go "remember the part where he..." and "wasn't it cool how she..." so many times and then the only way to go on is to overanalyze it and interpret it with your own cool, new spin. "I thought that was symbolic of..." or "I think the deeper meaning of that part is..." You could keep trying to one-up each other with your great new insights on it, but then it kind of becomes all about you--all about your thoughts on it, your opinions and interpretations of it--and none of it is real life.

Chuck Palahniuk goes on to say about his miserable characters, "So they create circumstances-whether or not they are aware of it-which force them on a quest to reconnect with people." A quest to reconnect with people is a great way to describe the gospel. We create circumstances, whether or not we are aware of it, when we stop looking at other people as "the jerks" and instead treat them as people that God created and deems worthy of care. I can strike up a conversation with that waiter that I see all the time. I can take time to listen to my neighbors and invite them into my life and world. I can ask that co-worker how his weekend trip went. And in doing so, I begin the quest for reconnection. Eventually, maybe, they will like me, get my humor, and even understand the lingo. Or maybe they won't. But it will be real life. So you can sit on your island or stay in your high-rise condo. I think going on a quest sounds a lot more exciting.

Open Hands

It's been a week of emotional and spiritual highs and lows. One of fighting giving in to my feelings versus holding on to my faith. And it's only Wednesday.

This quote is helping me...

"Living a life of faith means never knowing where you are being led, but it does know loving and knowing the one who is leading. It is literally a life of faith, not of understanding and reason--a life of knowing him who calls us to go." (Oswald Chambers)

Trying to stand with open hands, palms up, eyes closed--trusting.

Stoke the Fire

February. Michigan. Snow. Sub-zero windchills. "I hate this state. I hate the snow. I hate my commute." said my husband after a particularly bad drive home. Me, in my eternal optimist guise, remarked, "You're being quite the pessimist." "If you can't be pessimistic in Michigan in February, when can you be?" He got me on that one. I could have shared that I'd been fighting a funk of my own for several days.

And it had been one of those days. You know, the ones where it feels like everyone needs a little piece of you? I'm finding the problem is I like the idea of being a mentor, helping those that are a little newer in their faith-walk move forward and grow. I like the idea of coming alongside those I minister with and listening and encouraging them. I like the idea of it. The problem is sometimes I just don't like the work of it. And it does involve work.

It can be hard to set aside what you're focused on and really listen to someone who is lonely. It takes patience to offer counsel to someone who is struggling with the same issue today as yesterday, and often the day before. It can be soul-wearying to encourage a co-worker when the same critics are continuing to drain the life and joy out of their ministry week after week. Doing these things is more than work. It's sacrifice. It's laying aside your own agenda, your own to-do list, your own life. It's choosing to lay your time on the altar as a sacrifice. Choosing to lay your stuff on the altar as a sacrifice. Choosing to lay your self on the altar as a sacrifice. It's never easy. It's usually very, very hard. Sacrifice always involves giving up something we hold dearly. What I always seem to forget though, is that God gives it back to you in a myriad of ways. He provides. He strengthens. And in the giving up, He gives joy.

Even in February. In Michigan. In snow. In sub-zero temperatures. So, burn something on the altar this week. See if it doesn't warm you up a little bit.